OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
He told me all about his plan for proposing to his girlfriend as pillow talk.
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
Had a burrito last night in your honor
That's the nicest thing you've ever done
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
Tell me why i'm looking through my medical records and the last thing it said about my labor was 'vagina was explored'!?
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
There is a woman in the stall next to me giving a pep talk to her daughter that wants to call off her wedding. I'm afraid to pee!
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
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