She just sent me a txt where every word ended in "zzz", with about a hundred "!!!" and called herself "juicezzz". I need back up.
Bro, I met the coolest hottest chick tonight and she has the hottest friends.
Where are you?
Strip Club
There are thorn wounds on my balls, don't ever question my dedication to party again
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
I think you'll appreciae more than anyone that I'm renting my parking spot out for a half gallon of vodka a month.
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
You were just so carefree! People were like, "there's broken glass everywhere" and you were just like, IDGAFFFFFFF
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
Randomize
