I'm pouring my heart out in these texts and you're going around showing everyone???
And then a tiny penis fell out of my purse
don't worry, i already broke the ice when i told the story about how i super glued a picture of big bird to my vag.
My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
Eye surgery went well. Just can't believe it took getting lasers through my eyes to temporarily stop the vivid sex dreams I was having
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
No lie. I was hooking up with a former football player at UT and mid-hookup I yelled "I'M FRATERNIZING WITH THE ENEMY"
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
Was expecting a sext from Kristi and then my mom randomly sent me a pic of her ugly Xmas sweater. Worst. Buzzkill. Ever.
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize
