Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
I could have mohawked her pubes.
Just checked my missed calls... why did you call me 37 times from 2:14 to 3:58?
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
Nothing shouts "I'm single" like a thousand needlepoint pillows.
i need to put some appletini on your dick
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
They have beer where we have blood.
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
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