champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
Always fun waking up to 911 as your last dialed call.
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
She was mad I came so fast. I was like, It's the Olympics! Fastest time wins! We can train you in the offseason.
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
Was banging my ex last night when his roommate walked in... We kept going. #goaheadandwatch
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
He asked if I had any questions. Apparently, "how thick is the stick up your ass" was not a correct question.
I've seriously never been more thankful for marijuana and my resting bitchface.
I just watched two birds fight or fuck. It was crazy. Another bird was watching closer and I know that bird understood what was happening better than me.
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
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