it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
Topless wife handwashing shirt. Tonight marriage is good.
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
Got drunk in Atlantic City Flagged down some guy with two wrapped tampons like road flares for a cigarette.
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
I woke up in my bed with candy and beer bottles all around me and i dont know where any of it came from. I love valentines day.
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
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