And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
either way he was missing a nipple.
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
Im dating a 38 year old who's lap I can fit in. Tell me I don't have daddy issues.
Jake bring pizza.
JAKE BRING PIZZA.
Is singing the Indiana Jones theme while I put on the condom off limits?
I'm not the one who can lose their erection, so it's fair game
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
Ate a live seahorse, then tried to order a nacho bell grande from an ATM.
How the fuck do you get to keep practicing as a Nurse.
When you left the bar, you did two cartwheels and a heel click and RAN ALL THE WAY HOME.
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
my roomie eats chipotle far too often. when i was looking for a bag to throw up in I had my choice of a wlamart bag and 10 chipotle bags
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
Randomize
