I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
I told him that his face would look perfect between my legs. One of my most successful strategies yet.
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
The lady at walmart just said she is so happy im still alive....Was i that drunk on the 4th? Dont answer that
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
My car insurance payment showed up today, so no inflatable hot tub for now. Sorry to disappoint.
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
It seems that I didn’t convey clearly enough how well and truly fucked we are, Jack. Listen to me very closely: we are DEAD.
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
Randomize
