So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
These people don't understand my stages of drunk
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
Apparently while fucking a girl in the ass last night I cracked a molar, trying to find a dentist now.
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
Nobody cheats on THIS.
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
Randomize
