omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
It's like a toaster oven for my penis
It's cool, I power napped on the dryer while they were fucking in the bathroom so I'm good to go now. Where are you?
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
Thank god I work in a lab. This pinkeye is out of control and my safety glasses are the only thing stopping me from digging at my eye with a pen
He left a full handprint on my ass. He called it a "five-star review."
I told him I was going outside to throw up and I ended up passing out in the front yard in my underwear for 45 minutes. When I walked back inside he said "where have u been?". My husband ladies and gentlemen
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
I think you know you’ve caught feelings when you’re asking a tinder boy his opinion about your current fuck buddy.
Randomize
