I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
the breathalyzer kept saying danger. we made our new slogan danger we need more shots
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
the best part of christmas was when my mom opened the handcuffs that were supposed to be for jen. Surprisingly, not the most awkward situation of the day.
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
You just managed to turn Dr. Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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