i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
I don't give a shit about soccer but I'm really excited about drinking at 7 in the morning
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
That's cool. At least the punch line of my story isn't I shit in a booth at Denny's.
I was barred out and drunk as fuck locked out at 3am in my Indian costume. It was literally freezing outside. I laid down on the concrete and made a bonfire with dry leaves. Then proceeded to ask.the.bonfire nicely to "please dont go out". Drunk me went strait up survival mode.
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
Randomize