me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
I wish they had a "No Yankees" filter on status updates.
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
I hate it when she philosophizes drunkenly on my kitchen counter. not even sober do i understand latin.
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
Randomize
