Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
Just a heads up, the coffee pot is filled with Jager.
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
My mom is wine drunk and on painkillers. As invigorating as that conversation was, it was also a dark glimpse into my future
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
A bitchslap is in order.
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
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