from now on my penis is your penis
she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
After last night, I've decided I will now bang only men who professionally ride things for a living. I will accept jockeys, cowboys, bullriders, and pro bicyclists who lie and say they're bullriders.
Just for future questioning, I didnt break up with you over text
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
The last person that asked me out got pushed down an escalator
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
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