That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
We talked him into tasing himself.
Tried to dry my shoes in the oven last night.
He broke into my house just to tell me the door was locked.
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
i was trying to figure out what "tidy fucking" was when i realized he meant "titty fucking" and i need to start banging smarter people....
I think I ripped my underwear last night doing drunk squats
The dick pic bandit just sent me a poem about showering..
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
Maybe the "i killed someone" and "tequila makes my clothes come off" comments freaked him out.
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
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