I am in a vortex of obligation.
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
on the brightside, the semester can only get better from getting a dui at 8 am on the first day.
your optimism is becoming unhealthy
I am too drunk to make real decisions. I had pop rocks all over my ass earlier. This is not a joke.
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
I'm calling into work tomorrow for day drinking and kitten shopping. Totally legitimate.
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
my nose is crying tears of wow.
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
It's like every time I'm baked I discover my fingers all over again.
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
Did you clean my apartment?
I thought it was a dream, I'm sorry
Please stay more often
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize
