UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
i woke up surrounded by junior mints. not to mention, there was a huge pyramid of natty cans baracading the door shut. this is why i can't drink alone.
Things found in my vomit last night: cell phone, Von Hayes rookie card, a boot, my dignity
He just used my bikini trimmer to give himself a fumanchu. And I still plan on having sex with him tonight. This has to be what true love feels like.
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
Children cease to be precious when they crap their shorts in the pool I exercise at.
So I just crossed my legs and I was like what is this lump on my leg? Oooh its my underwear from last time I wore these jeans...
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
in mid sex he pointed out my great gatsby tattoo and we started discussing themes and metaphors from our fave fitzgerald novels
you need to stop fucking English majors
Like my mom really needs to know just how non existent my sex life is
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