Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
i don't think my family understands the severity of a twenty first birthday.
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
My wedding band has saved me from at least four cases of herpes tonight.
asked the cab driver where he learned Swahili last night.
Good thing I took the morning after pill cuz I pretty much had packaged seamen in me like I was a squirrel saving it for later or something
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
My apartment looks like the apocalypse of sobriety.
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
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