im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
I wish i had a shirt that said, "I know what you're thinking and it's not herpes on my face"
At the pride parade. It's not even noon and I'm drunk as shit... for equality of course
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
Just put a sign on a baby carriage that says "all daddy wanted was a blowjob" might get fired.
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
Okay. Did anyone see me spend $1600 at the strip club last night? Or is this someone else's receipt in my pocket?
Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago.
theres 2 cans of open Campbell's soup on the counter and a note that says "guess which one is puke" ... want lunch?
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
BRING THE BAGELS
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
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