ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
I need to figure out what I wanna do with my life.
There are margaritas in the freezer still.
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
I found my spirit animal in the shower. It's a sloth/bear that lives in my chest.
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
In her defense, she didn't know I had a twin brother. Plus, we're even: I banged her sister.
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
Randomize
