ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
I just had teddy grams, ritz crackers, and twizzlers for dinner. Hello, end of the semester.
He's trying to kill me, one liver cell at a time. It's going to be a slow, but awesome death
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
got woken up at 7:30 by a drunk girl asking me where she was... apparently she slept on my futon
she was in a cheetah costume
Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
Dreamt I had my own personal vibrator rep, who made house calls. I earned an upgrade to an electric model, since I was burning through batteries. That's it. Time for a bf.
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
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