so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
Jerry, you need to find god
Scream out, "Tax-Free dick over here" in the bar. Ladies love tax free stuff
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
Well I went on a freakin rampage and destroyed a fan and claimed that it wasn't doing its fan duties... Then I knocked on everybody's doors in the hall and asked if they were content with their fan's performance and if not I would take care of it...
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
I won't apologize to a one balled man
I got kicked out of the bar for suggesting that the bartender drop her tits into my Redbull instead of the usual liquor
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
Randomize
