you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
i think i have herpe
just one?
Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
he kept telling me that god made these magical balloons called condoms
we tried to pick out bridesmaid dresses with pockets so we could sneak flasks in with us. what the fuck is the point of a dry wedding?
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
Is everyone touching their nose at me a sign that I should stop snorting vicodin off my phone in the bathroom at school?
MY INSIDES ARE BASICALLY BEING WRUNG BY A CHAINSAW IM NEVER TAKING PLAN B AGAIN
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
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