Your tits are I can't wait for
12 pack with dinner. Living by yourself is awesome.
Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
You realize that if you get murdered while we're talking, I'm gonna have to explain to your next of kin why the last thing on your phone is a picture of my boobs.
He pulled out a red and green condom and then started humming "Here Comes Santa Claus." Happy holidays indeed.
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
My friends said as soon as you walked in, I motor boated you like there was no tomorrow.
Yeah, I liked it.
Hey man, he's too drunk to remember what you said. What drugs are we buying and when should we expect them?
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
Randomize
