I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
decided to have an easter egg hunt this year. the golden egg has weed in it and all the others have shots of vodka. who said we were too old for easter?!?
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
his phone is always ringing though. It makes me feel like I'm dating a doctor who's always on call.
yeah, dating a doctor sounds much better than fucking your drug dealer.
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
I just saw that blonde chick you wanna bang rolling down the hall wearing a Thor mask..
Wow. We're meant to be..
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
Very unfortunate to find out the kid who took your virginity has never seen Star Wars🙃
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