So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
you can't just make up for the fact that you broke up with me by tagging yourelf in my embarrassing facebook videos of you
I left my Thanksgiving family dinner puking in my hands from the worst hangover in the world
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
you slapped the bag of goldfish out of her hands and screamed, "BITCH THIS AINT NO AQUARIUM". That's how fucked up
I mean I'm not saying I have my life together but I did just put nerds in a bottle of champagne and then drank from the bottle
"Masturbate" is an actual item on an actual ToDo list of mine. It is at the top.
Dude I left his house at 5:30 a.m. after you peed on his front door and then tried to fight me for my blanket. Don't even do that at my house or I will end you.
hahahahaha. Worst. Text. Ever.
Randomize
