Yeah I'm buying him lunch right now because I shot him with the fire extinguisher last night
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
I thought of you this morning when I woke up in a bed with a girl wrapped in duct tape dressed as a coors light can.
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
I started the day with dreams of getting laid and ended it with the reality of eating Taco Bell in my bed with my dog.
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
I have vodka, fruit gushers, and health insurance. Let's party.
Randomize
