MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
She brought an overnight bag to my party. Might as well have shown up wearing only a thong and a bottle of whip cream in her hand.
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
Yeah I had to push her down the hallway to the hotel room in a luggage carrier. The guy at the desk told me goodluck
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
He keeps texting me videos of fish swimming in his fish tank, so I think it's safe to say he's back on weed.
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
Having to crawl on my hands and knees because I woke up with a mysterious broken foot this morning...
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
Did I see you at the bar last night?
Yes. You just kept grabbing my boobs and saying how much better they are than yours...
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
Randomize
