Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
just passed out while on hold to see if i left my debit card at the bar last night.
If I EVER wake up with two black eyes again you better come up with a better story than trying to see how many punches I could take.
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
Dude, I passed out on the side walk, lost my phone and shirt, and walked 12 miles home after I disappeared from the club
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
He overslept for our prescheduled morning sex. The fact that my vagina isn't enough to get him out of bed was the last straw.
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
A unicorn in pinstripe pants just got on the J at Dolores stop. It can only be a good night
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
Randomize
