Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
Apparently Sundays are the worst days for your friends to get their head split open and need stitches...there's only 1 doctor on duty
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
She told me a motorboat isn't successful unless they come out gasping for air. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!!!
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
Today's goals: get day drunk then sober up in time for the walking dead tonight.
I'm planning our wedding on the computer and our threesome on my phone. At the same time.
Please come over. It's a pajama and burn-2016-in-effigy party
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
Randomize
