how can u be prego again
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
i just opened a bottle of wine with my dads power tools
She just called to say she can support a full bottle of vodka between "the girls" now. I'm going over, don't try and stop me.
my hip hurts so fuckin bad. and I just found a half eaten burrito in my nightstand drawer.
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
Dude. Got a sore throat. Don't know if it's because my body is rejecting Michigan or cause of the bad ass blow job I gave last night
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
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