Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
so he reminded me it was our 9 month anniversary and then said "we could've had a baby by now"
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
my credit card is covered in vodka and bad memories
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
He screamed AMERICA, took a shot of vodka out of a Tupperware container, and then asked if he could see my tits
At 27 it's no longer called 'slutty', it's called having a healthy sex life...
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
Ryan got so drunk he gave a hobo $20 and I had to zip tie him to the bed so he doesn't out stupid himself
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
What color nail polish screams, "Either fuck me or get the hell out of my way"?
last night I used snow as a chaser
You sent me a very drunk love letter
Was it the one about pterodactyls?
I was disappointed I thought you actually loved me
Somehow I don't think offering me edibles is what dad meant by checking in on me
They're the hard candy kind!
Randomize
