I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
my throat hurts so bad i feel like i just gave head to a cactus.
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
the non-midget kid sent 8,000 texts in a month. the midget parents are pissed. THIS IS EPIC WHEN YOUR HIGH.
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
Remember when I got my car stuck in my backyard?
But we only had three ninja turtles. So everyone that would ask us where Donatello was, we would say "what? He's gone? Shredder is at it again!"
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
Sorry for not calling you back. I got drunk and passed out on the kitchen floor. I just found my phone in the shower.
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
Randomize
