I feel dirty and I went home alone. Bars should be like airlines and make fat girls pay double for everything.
i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles!
what drugs are you on?
none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
I'm covered in salsa and facewash. I think I'm doing something wrong over here.
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
I look like a hot mess, emphasis on the hot now, more emphasis on the mess later
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
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