we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
Me liking this guy is the best diet ever. Do I want this cookie...or do I want to get laid.
Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
Is it bad of me to apply as a night shift counselor at a boys orphanage purely because of how laid that would get me at bars?
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
You're married and I'm going to make out with a stranger tonight. Isn't that weird? It's like a gap in the time space continium.
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
Randomize
