Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
He had one of those small greek statue penises
Nothing says Christmas like gin and tears.
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
I asked him to tell me a bedtime story, then threw up on him.
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
Randomize
