Say "Steve Buscemi is hot." with a straight face.
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
some guy i've known for a week sent me nudes saying "you're welcome" i need an award for this birthday
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
Did we kick in my basement door last night?
Yes. I think you actually bought tennis shoes specifically for that application.
No my problem is I'm working and its a beautiful Saturday. I should be recovering from a hangover and out golfing. Fuck responsibility. I miss college.
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
Randomize
