Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
There is only so much cookie dough and masturbating I can handle in one night.
You are number one in my heart. But in the dick Olympics you're disqualified.
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
whoa! who said he's my boyfriend?
Oops. Sorry. That guy you keep accidentally running into in public. And at home. And with your vagina.
So the contents found in my winter coats this year: coat 1, condom and 10$. Coat 2, condom and 75$ check. Coat 3, 2.05$ and a sunflower seed.
Obviously coat 3 had the best time since you used the condom and all of the money
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
i havent showered for 4 days and i just made my dog smell my arm pit. also, im stoned.
Randomize
