Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
I just found a thank you note I apparently wrote to my bed last night for letting me borrow the comforter.
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
I just found like 5 packs of sparklers. If someone doesn't get set on fire tonight I am retiring from party hosting.
Yeah, I wouldn't mind getting fingered in the corner of a dive bar again.
You should've come to the party. It was like an identity parade of everyone you screwed last year.
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
If I die tonight somebody's going to have to let all my tinder matches know.
After we had sex he went to the kitchen, came back with a bag of funyuns and ate them buck ass naked in his bedroom doorway. Had no idea how to react to that one.
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize
