have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
I forgot to tell you the best part. The folded up paper he wrote his number on opened up to be a picture of him when he was younger wearing a Columbia tshirt in front of NASA and in pen said his name and "space consultant."
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
I took a cab from the club to the grocery store. I needed peanut butter.
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
I knew how high you were when you put a french fry in your mouth and said 'fuck, this tastes like meat but feels blue.'
No my problem is I'm working and its a beautiful Saturday. I should be recovering from a hangover and out golfing. Fuck responsibility. I miss college.
Randomize
