I think i sorta joined a cult last night
Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
so hey instead of everyone buying me a birthday present can everyone just pitch in for my abortion?
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
Hate the very realistic pregnancy dreams. Like my dream when I birthed the pirate ships. SO REAL...
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
he told me he had a dream that he laid his head in my lap and silently gazed up at me. WHY AM I ALWAYS THE DUDE IN RELATIONSHIPS
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
My roommate just angrily told the cat he should have knocked, but that's not lockdown madness. They're always like that.
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