I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
I just ran your car into a ups truck....but on a up note I have a handle of fireball and breakfast burritos
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
Randomize
