i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
She wants to practice her harmonica skills on my penis
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
And don't worry, my exact words were "I can't believe a baby came outta that thing"
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
In her defense, she didn't know I had a twin brother. Plus, we're even: I banged her sister.
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
The neighbors ahemed the WHOLE time. Their kids are the ones that scream loud enough for me to remember my birth control. It's payback!
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