You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
We attempted to microwave fifteen corndogs in the microwave and may have ruined it. Also there were fake mustaches on all of his appliances...he said he doesn't like drunk me.
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
The cop let us off with a warning because I had more Twitter followers than he did. The future is terrifying.
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
So, random question. How much should you tip a Lyft driver when you realized you've fucked his sister? Asking for a friend.
Randomize
