sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
Mother fucker, I knew it was bad when you tried making out with my car window
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
Bro, if we got a house, it'd basically be a revolving door for slightly overweight, but extra cute, sexually deviant girls with daddy issues.
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
I wish I could send you one of those donuts I had. Like teleport it to you. Because it would change your life
Well you went to the bar with your crutches last night & everyone including the DJ started chanting "put your crutches in the air"
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
He showed up in a Prius. I didn’t even wanna.... So I left.
I swear I only fuck him for the huge bottle of smart water he gives me afterwards.
Randomize
