So I have to go swallow an entire zebra. Ur on ur own girl.
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
The guy in the cage next to me is having phone sex. His girlfriend is in College Library. Why is my life ridiculous.
I informed him that we had less than 5 minutes left to live, and his first words were "I'm trying to think of a good They Might Be Giants quip"
Oh no. He's definitely text-flirting with me. No straight man over 30 has any other excuse to use so many smiley faces...
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