there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
while you were getting the key to the dorm from the lobby i was giving a drunk monolog to the security camera about my life
Well today was Thanksgiving Anti-Miracle Daydrinkathon so I had to be drunk by 2pm
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
Blood and glitter go together right?
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
It could be worse. I was dumped by a guy in a kilt after he gave my shoes away on St. Patrick's Day.
He carried around a bottle of jäger the whole night and when everyone thought the cops came, he started doing push ups in the middle of the floor cause he said it calmed him down.
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
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