Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
Apparently I farted on her in my sleep. Then, just to be sure she was cool, I did it again on purpose and she didnt say anything. So, WIN?
do you know why i have a volvo grill taped to the back of my car?
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
Did you high five my face last night?
Yes. Yes I did.
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
Holy sore nipples Batman
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
You told him he looked like Jesus and that you wanted to fuck his face, I'd say your blind date went well
I woke up in a bush somewhere in Tucson with a full suit on. Great way to end my birthday.
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