OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
My last google search was "mavis beacon techs tping" Thank god google auto corrects bc otherwise i wouldn't know that i drunk-type 13 words a minute.
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
He's a waiter, looks 15, and told me he loved me after only talking to me for 30 minutes. I told him I wanted a margarita. We got 3 free pitchers. I may have to make this our regular Wednesday night hangout.
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
Fun fact: nipples work on touch screens. Tell your friends :)
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
Randomize
